Raising three children with special needs: How NTUC Care helps one father support a family of six

• ICA officer Isham Abdul Latif is the sole breadwinner for a family of six, raising four children, three of whom have special needs, while his wife cares for them full-time.

• Support from NTUC Care’s Caregiver Support, Special Assistance and Back-to-School programmes has helped the family manage its tight budget, cover school needs and give the children occasional treats.

• Grateful for how his children have shaped his life, Isham encourages other caregivers not to be afraid to seek help and hopes for greater public understanding of children with special needs.

Three of Isham Abdul Latif’s four children have special needs.

There have been difficult years. Years of tantrums and fights at school. Years of learning that a change in teacher or an unexpected break in routine could unsettle a child in ways other families might not immediately understand.

There have also been years when money had to be counted carefully, when even a simple fast-food meal for six, costing about $60, became something to think twice about.

Through those years, Isham and his family have received assistance from several NTUC Care programmes, helping with some of the costs of raising four children on a single income.

But ask Isham whether he has ever wished for a different life, and he does not hesitate.

“I don’t wish for that, actually,” he said. “If I have a different life, it would be a different me.”

He believes his children have made him who he is.

The 45-year-old Immigration and Checkpoints Authority (ICA) officer and his wife are raising four children, aged 16, 14, 13 and 11.

Their three older children have special needs and attend a special education school in Simei, while their youngest is in Primary 5.

His wife stopped working around 2011 to care for the children. Since then, Isham has been the family’s sole breadwinner.

Raising three children with special needs

After almost 19 years with ICA, Isham is accustomed to working rotating morning and night shifts. He takes home about $2,600 to $2,800 a month to support the family of six.

His wife handles much of the children’s day-to-day care while he is at work. But whenever Isham is home, parenting is a shared responsibility.

Almost every day, the couple checks in with their children about school, their classmates and any difficulties they may have faced.

When something has gone wrong, they help their children understand what happened and how they can respond.

Over the years, Isham and his wife have also learnt that each child requires a different approach.

Isham describes his eldest as having a “borderline IQ disability”. She is intensely curious and will keep asking questions until she understands something clearly.

Another of his children learns quickly through listening and observation, although verbal communication can be difficult.

One of his sons, who is autistic, depends heavily on routine. A clear timetable helps him know what to expect, while an unexpected change at school or at home can leave him confused or agitated.

When the children were younger, managing their different needs could be particularly difficult.

“It was very chaotic,” Isham recalled.

There were tantrums, fights at school and occasions when the children wanted to return home before the school day was over.

Even the departure of a familiar teacher could be upsetting. When a favourite teacher left, one of his children initially refused to return to school.

Isham and his wife patiently explained that change was something they would encounter throughout their lives.

“You can’t have the same person together with you throughout the years. Sometimes you have to experience changes,” he said.

As the children have grown older, things have gradually become easier.

Their youngest child has also grown accustomed to her siblings’ needs. When the family goes out, they stay together and remind the children to look out for one another.

Just a family looking after its own.

Making one income stretch for a family of six

Alongside the demands of caregiving is another constant consideration for Isham and his wife: how to make one income provide for six people.

Even a fast-food meal for the family can cost about $60.

So they plan carefully, prioritising bills and necessities and making what they have stretch.

Several years ago, Isham discovered how quickly that careful balance could be disrupted.

He fell ill and had to take about two weeks of unpaid leave.

When his salary arrived the following month, he could afford to pay only half of the household bills.

Isham contacted his utilities provider, explained the situation and was placed on a three-month repayment plan.

The family got through it.

But the experience showed how vulnerable a household can become when six people depend on a single salary and that income is unexpectedly reduced.

It also means there is often little room for spending beyond what the family needs.

How NTUC Care helps ease the financial pressure

Isham has been an NTUC union member for about a decade, and his family has received assistance through several NTUC Care programmes over the years.

He has benefited several times from the NTUC Care (Back-to-School) programme, which has helped the family with expenses associated with his children’s schooling.

He has also received NTUC Care (Special Assistance).

In 2026, Isham became a beneficiary of the NTUC Care (Caregiver Support) for Caregivers of Children with Special Needs.

The programme provides eligible primary caregivers with one-time financial assistance of $1,000 per special needs child to help with educational and daily needs.

For a family accustomed to carefully accounting for its expenses, the additional support provides some breathing room.

It helps with the practical costs of raising the children, but for Isham, its value goes beyond paying for necessities.

It gives him the chance, occasionally, to let his children choose something simply because they would enjoy it.

When there is additional money available, Isham sets a budget and asks them what they would like.

Sometimes they choose stationery or art materials. Sometimes it is a meal they have been looking forward to.

And sometimes, they choose Lego.

Isham particularly likes buying Lego sets for his children.

They can sit down and build something piece by piece. When they are finished, they can put it on display. Later, they can dismantle it and build something entirely new.

Without the additional financial support, these seemingly small purchases would be harder to justify against the family’s other expenses.

“It’d be tough for me to splurge on them,” Isham said.

For Isham, that is one of the less obvious ways financial assistance can make a difference.

It is not only about meeting an immediate expense. It can also give a family that spends much of its time thinking about what it needs a little room to enjoy something it wants.

Why seeking caregiver support matters

Having received assistance himself, Isham hopes other caregivers who need support will not hesitate to seek it.

“Just give it a go. There’s no harm in trying,” he said.

Some families may find it difficult to acknowledge that they need assistance, he said. But asking for help is ultimately about the people who depend on them.

Isham also hopes there will be greater understanding of children with special needs.

Not every condition is immediately visible, he said, but a child may still need additional patience, care and understanding from the people around them.

After years of learning how to meet his children’s different needs, Isham’s hopes for them are simple.

He wants them to be happy.

He wants each of them to find fulfilment in whatever they can achieve.

There have been difficult years, and there may be difficult days still to come.

But ask Isham whether he would exchange the life they have built for another, and his answer remains the same.

A different life, he said, would have made him a different person.

“I’m really so thankful to have them.”

To help families in need like Isham’s, you can donate to the NTUC-U Care Fund.